It’s so interesting how our minds operate almost entirely in metaphor. How they take in what they see and become it. There is an evolutionary component to our brains that invites us to merge with what we see. The part of our brains that observe and learn from observation is much, much older than the logic and reasoning portion of the brain. Scientists say we evolved this way because while learning through experience is important, sometimes learning through observation is quicker and safer.
I think of that now in these times of high speed technology. What we tend to observe most often are the computers and cell phones that we engage with on a daily basis. There is continually a new version, another upgrade. You never have to turn it off if you don’t want to. An endless stream of information that promises to entertain you without fail. It becomes easy to forget that we are not like that.
When I was first starting out on my spiritual journey I remember feeling frustrated quite often. I expected “more” of myself. I wanted to “evolve” quickly and heal everything at once. A chronic overachiever, it was frustrating to see myself move slowly, not at all, or backwards.
However, this is not how the human journey really goes.
As far as I can tell this whole linear narrative is one we created. To tell stories, to operate in a system, to relate day to day.
During that time period I was living in the North. There had been an incredible snow storm in the Spring, where the earth was blanketed in white. After that the days started to warm up. Sunny day after sunny day for a week. That week went by and I noticed there were still patches of snow on the ground. Not everything had melted yet.
In that moment I recognized that I was more like the earth in this way.
Even though I had been engaging in my practices, creating a safe environment for myself, and taking care of my body the healing process was still taking time. There is not an instant fix for anything in this world, especially not a divine and miraculous being such as yourself.
And perhaps nothing is even wrong with you at all. Maybe it’s the idea that there is something wrong with you that is amiss.
Allow yourself to let go of this idea that you need to get “better.” Instead, invite yourself to have seasons. Embrace every part of yourself. Sit in awe and wonder that is the universe of your being.
There is nowhere to go but here. There is no other time than now.
Sit. Observe. Love. Flow.